Tuesday, September 27, 2016

Caffeine

Your Brain on Caffeine

Im going to write about something that may be upsetting to some people.

I'm going to talk about the dangers of caffeine.

So, if caffeine and you are best friends and it's something you aren't ready to hear yet, I suggest walking away now because my husband quit cold turkey the day he learned all this 😁


Let me ask you something.....Why do you think caffeine is added into soda and other beverages in the first place?

Saturday, September 3, 2016

Wearing Lingerie


I know this can be a touchy subject so as an addict, and my husband also being an addict, I'm going to explain the reasons why I personally don't wear lingerie anymore.

Tuesday, August 30, 2016

Should My Husband Take A Polygraph?

If Your Husband Struggles With a Sexual Addiction Should He Take a Polygraph?


I love polygraphs.


I believe all sex addicts should take an annual polygraph.

Friday, August 5, 2016

Does Masturbation Cause Sexual Dysfunction?

Scientific and Personal Reasons of Why Masturbation Can Cause Sexual & Erectile Dysfunction.


Does Masturbation Cause Erectile Dysfunction



I started masturbating when I was 5 yrs old. I had no religious church induced shame nor any parental induced shame over masturbation because I didn't even know that I was masturbating until my late teens. My parents never knew I masturbated. They didnt have sex/masturbation talks with me about what was right vs wrong, nor did I hear much about masturbation/sex at church. And even after I DID found out that what I was doing was masturbating, I thought it was healthy and that it caused no harm. I'd say to myself "Yea right, like touching myself is going to hurt myself or anyone else haha, that's so STUPID. Its helping me learn my body and practice for when I have sex. Those are good things! 👍"...

It wasn't until 7 yrs ago when I got sober that I started looking back and discovering that no matter how OK I thought masturbation was, it still in and of itself brought shame. And I never in a million years would have believed masturbation could have caused such negative horrible effects on my bodies ability to function properly.

Ive already wrote the post about what the LDS Church thinks about masturbation HERE, so now I'm gonna talk about the medical side of masturbation and how contrary to current popular belief, the studies actually show it is NOT healthy for the body, and masturbation DOES cause Sexual Dysfunction in both men and women.

First like always, let's look at some official definitions of Masturbation. You know, just for clarity. 😉

Sunday, July 31, 2016

LDS Mormon View On Masturbation


"Masturbation is sex with self. Sex with self is sex with someone other than your husband or wife to whom you are legally and lawfully married.Therefore, masturbation is a violation of temple covenants."
- LDS author Andrew Pippanne, creator of the website rowboatandmarbles.org


One cannot masturbate and still enter the temple worthily and the LDS Church has been extremely clear on this. Going to the temple unworthily not only hurts oneself, but it hurts one's family and children . Just because an unlearned bishop, ward member, friend, therapist etc. doesn't specifically "ask" it in a temple interview, gives permission, or says its natural and OK, that doesn't mean God gives permission. It is a sin to enter the temple unworthily. But before we go into everything the LDS church says about masturbation, lets first break down what "Being Worthy" actually means.

Sunday, July 3, 2016

Questions To Ask Your Husband

If you just found out about your husbands addiction and are going through the full disclosure, these questions may be helpful to ask.




Friday, June 17, 2016

Is There Something Wrong With Me That Attracts Sex Addicts?


Do You Attract Addicts? 


I used to believe so. And yes, this may be the case with some people.

BUT hear me out.

If statistics say 70-80% of men are looking at porn now days (and those are only the ones who admit it)........

Then you could be the most healthy person in the world and guess what? The odds are still against you. :(

Sunday, May 29, 2016

Commanded To Forgive

 Must We Forgive Those Who Harm Us And Is Forgiveness The Same As Trust?

LDS.org Quotes

The quotes below have brought me comfort. At first, I honestly didn't even know what the word "forgive" really meant, despite hearing the word so often growing up.  I think it's important to remember that forgiveness doesn't have a timetable. There's no allotted time ---- "Oh, your husband cheated on you? You have 6 months to forgive"---- ha. No no it doesn't work like that.

Wednesday, April 27, 2016

70% of Men Look At Pornography

Pornography Statistics



These are some more recent statistics from all around the world (and some old stats taken before smart phones) that show a general pretty consistent 70-80%-ish range of men look at porn at the very LEAST once a month. Addicts are notorious for lying about the frequency of porn use, kinda makes you wonder what the REAL percentage is.

Monday, April 11, 2016

Gaslighting is Abuse.

What is Gaslighting?

 Quotes & Resources

1.
Oxford Dictionary states:
"Gaslight - Manipulate (someone) by psychological means into questioning their own sanity"

Sunday, April 3, 2016

Is Sex a Responsibility?

  Is it Your Responsibility to Have Sex With Your Husband? 

Quotes From LDS Mormon Church Leaders

Many wives struggle with feeling like it is their responsibility to have sex with their husbands. Thankfully, I believe the LDS Church is very clear on this subject.

If anyone ever tries to convince you that your husband needs sex and that it is your duty as a wife to be "available" for him, please refer them to these lds. org quotes. ✌😁

Friday, April 1, 2016

Is the Addict Label Helpful or Hurtful?


 

Many people believe that using the term "sex addict" is detrimental, and should no longer be used when treating sex addicts because it causes them to feel too much shame.

I can definitely see how someone could feel shame by calling themselves a sex addict. I can also see how someone could feel shame by saying "I look at pornography all the time and can't stop".

Monday, February 29, 2016

Anger Can Be Healthy For Betrayed Wives

To the innocent wives suffering Betrayal Trauma ❤


Is ALL anger bad? Should we always avoid anger at all costs? Why would Christ show anger with the money changers if it's so wrong?


Lds. org states:
"Anger is an emotion everyone experiences. Dealing with it in healthy ways is an essential life skill to learn." - New Era

&

An lds. org article about living with an alcoholic parent states:
(To the friend of the abused)
  "Drunk people do disgusting things. They may even abuse their children.
   Your friend will be both shamed and angered by these actions. And she may feel guilty about her anger. Let her know that she has a right to be angry.
   Just help her direct and control that anger so it doesn’t cause her serious trouble."
(To the abused)
 "..Don’t feel guilty about it. It’s okay to feel angry. Anyone in your circumstances would feel that way.
   And if you haven’t been able to forgive him, keep trying, but don’t feel guilty about that either.
   Forgiving is not an easy virtue to master, and nobody’s timing you." - Living with an alcoholic parent by Anne Lawrence https://www.lds.org/liahona/1989/08/drunk-again-living-with-an-alcoholic-parent?lang=eng

Saturday, February 13, 2016

Why Do Addicts Lie?

Why does your addict husband lie?


Because their brain believes complete honesty will kill them.

Haha no, seriously.

It seems silly to think that the brain would really think it would die from being honest.

Hear me out...

Sunday, January 3, 2016

STOP Those Annoying Advertisments & Friend Suggestions

 Make Your Computer Safer!

Here is a list of ways to Opt-Out of many different types of "Interest Based Ads". I suggest opting out of all of them for every browser (chrome, Firefox, etc), and on every computer and/or iOS/Android device.

Ever go shopping online for something, for example let's say "shoes", only to then see ads for shoes pop up everywhere online afterward?
Yep. Those are called Interest Based Ads. Companies track your data (age, location, online history, your online likes and interests etc etc) and they use this data to send you advertisements customized to YOU and your computer's Advertising ID/IP address

Lame, right?


While this feature may seem harmless to someone who doesn't care to see innocent shoe ads, sadly this feature can be very dangerous to unsuspecting victims when there is someone viewing pornography in the home. No one wants their kids to get online and see those dang inappropriate sex/dating ads all because a family member was surfing porn an hour earlier ha, ok? No bueno :)

While using these steps to protect your computer won't completely remove the threat of unwanted exposure (Don't get me started the havoc pornography viewing has on the nasty spam emails that can get sent to everyone who uses the computer and the computer viruses pornography causes), these will definitely help reduce accidental exposure.